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Thursday, March 12, 2015

TAXES and playing with taxes

  Don’t Forget to Deduct…

Borrowing a line from Mark Twain, 
the rumors of this deduction’s demise 
are greatly exaggerated.

The tax-preparation chain H&R Block is running a commercial this year that invites Americans to “get their billions back.” 

For where is my refund?, watch here.

Mark Twain Museum: The Stories Started Here

In London,  the newspaper had it presently that Mark Twain was lying at the point of death. A reporter ferreted him out and [showed him the telegram]:
His orders read:
“If Mark Twain very ill, five hundred words. If dead, send one thousand.”

Enjoy the 3-page story (1870) 

by no other writer then Mark Twain himself,a man known to everyone and liked by all.

"What were your profits, in 1869, 
from any trade, business, or vocation, 
wherever carried on?" 

And that inquiry (..... got me) 
 into declaring an income of $214,000. 
By law, $1,000 of this was exempt from income tax 
- the only relief I could see, 
and it was only a drop in the ocean. 
At the legal five per cent, 
I must pay over to the Government 
the appalling sum of $10,650, income tax

He did it simply by deftly manipulating the bill of "DEDUCTIONS." 

He set down: 
my "State, national, and municipal taxes" at so much; 
my "losses by shipwreck, fire, etc." at so much; 
my "loss on sales of real estate" -
 on "live stock sold" 
- payments for rent of homestead" 
- on "repairs, improvements, interest" 
- on "previously taxed salary as an officer of the United States Army, Navy, Revenue Service, and other things. 

He got astonishing "deductions" 
out of each and every one 
of these matters 
- each and every one of them. 

And when he was done he handed me the paper, 
and I saw at a glance that during the year 1869 my income, 
in the way of profit, had been $1,250.40.

 "Now," said he, "the thousand dollars
 is exempt by law. 
What you want to do is to go and 
swear this document in and 
pay tax on the two hundred and fifty dollars."

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